by Zoe A. Choo

I haven’t been updating this blog for quite some time, and apparently my core reason was distraction. I was heavily distracted by the woes of life, and ironically, distracting myself away from it.

To explain the previous sentence, it meant that I began to focusing at the problems I was currently facing, thereafter magnifying it, and having the misconception that my problems were bad, I just needed to shift my mind off it and I acted upon it by indulging in video games and binge-watching drama series, shutting the world out.

Before I knew it, my life began to mess up by my neglect to tasks – just like an untidy room. I began to get emotionally oblivious to the real world while having emotions attached to an imaginary life on screen, slowly and steadily becoming absent in my soul. My mind was was either filled with an alternate life, reminiscing of a past, some random thoughts or completely blank. Tearing myself between wanting to get things done and not getting anything done. I ain’t any better than an addict.

Pastor Don once shared a story with me when I first met him. He told me that a sniper has to be extremely focused, if he is off the focal point by 0.05mm (they say the devil is in the details, it’s always the little things), imagine where it gets when it is fired off 300 metres away (the distance would otherwise be processed through time).

Yet God loves His children so much, He doesn’t let me fall away too far that He placed so many people around me as bumpers. One of them was Yuwen, who raved about Todd White and pestered me to watch his videos that would otherwise entice me (and it totally did) to attend a special service on Wednesday with her.

To cut the long story short, I got my turning point and got on fire again thanks to my dear friend, Jerzelle/Yuwen/Taiwan/BFFL. This time, reassured by how much God loves us and my identity as His daughter, His mad daughter. Reassured that if I am going to be crazy, I am going to be crazy for my Father, for Jesus – willing to do what the Holy Spirit tells me to. I’ve also learnt that how much KNOWING our identity liberates us.

Looking back, I obviously didn’t understand what I was naming my blog. Yet, I know I’m still barely scratching the surface. Living a life with God and for God is so much of an adventure. I can’t wait for what’s ahead. #India