by Zoe A. Choo

I battled with the deceptions and snares of my past for about a month. Everything came rushing in, the events and all of the feelings attached to it. The memories were about 3 years old.

During that period of time, I fell into the snares of my past, the Accuser pointing fingers at me – how I wasn’t clean, how I was merely a toy or trash-bin, how I could never be beautiful enough, driving me to find fault at myself or at anyone who could be blamed. My feelings were all over the place and I was in confusion. My flesh responded with its survival instincts, and I was drawn to what I used to think was a coping mechanism but they were all lies. ALL LIES.

I was listening to Bill Johnson’s sermon today and I was completely liberated by what he said. Thank You Holy Spirit. He said that the past no longer exists, it was purchased. Anytime we revisit the events from our past without the blood of Jesus, we visit a lie and expose ourselves into a realm of deception. We have no right to do that. Jesus took all of our wrongs and nailed it on the cross, the work is completely done. It is finished. God will use all of the good, the bad and especially the ugly, to powerfully proclaim the healing nature of His grace.

“But anytime I start dwelling and meditating on the things of the past, separate from the redemptive work of Christ, I’m actually visiting a lie because I’m visiting something that no longer exists – it was bought. I’d actually subject myself to emotions that were related to something that was not redeemed. I don’t have the right to those emotions. I don’t have the right to those imaginations because those imaginations will only take me to a place where I resist the work of God. I can’t afford to have a thought about me that He doesn’t have in His head about me.” – Bill Johnson

This is just amazing.

Because I am His beautiful daughter. He calls me worthy and He loves me so much, over and over and over. He eyes are always on me. His grace covers me. I am who I am by His grace. I am His warrior. I am His beloved child. He loves me so much He promised He will never leave me or forsake me. Never. His thoughts towards me are of good and not of evil, to prosper me, to give me a hope and a future. He will make me a blessing.

And I love Him so much, so much.