by Zoe A. Choo

I’ve so much to write – it’s now November and I’m five days in.

If I can summarise everything that has happened, there was fire, there were strong winds, there were quakes but after it all, it’s still, the still, small voice that I’m listening to; or that I long to hear. My Shepherd’s voice, my Lover’s whisper, my King and my Dad’s heart, Holy Spirit’s wisdom and instructions for adventures. To delight in yielding.

Things are getting harder and easier at the same time, not the hard that I was previously used to – so much work, filling up my schedule, hardly having enough sleep or having a debilitating condition but having Holy Spirit reveal my intentions even when outwardly, it looks commendable. The Lord always looks at the heart. Having to deny myself and to obey Him and to find such an ease in it, nothing is what I used to think.

This also included Holy Spirit telling me to stop forcing myself to watch a good sermon and telling me to watch Drop Dead Diva (yes, I know) because He knew what was in my heart and then explaining to me how our need to be or do good spiritual discipline sometimes backfires, or getting me to reject what seems like an important event or place to be in, or getting me to reject donating to certain causes. Everything is constantly new, but yet they are not.

I wondered how philosophers find depth when “deep cries out to deep”.